Warnings: Extreme Fluff Ahead
This was beta'ed by the fantabulous winkielovegood, but it has not been Brit-picked, so if anyone sees anything, please let me know.
"Percy? Perce, wake up!"
"Wha . . .?" Percy sort of half-opened one eye.
"Come on, Perce. Mum's about to have kittens. Wake up!"
Percy opened both eyes, but found he really didn't want to, so he squinted at the red-head standing over him. "Are you Ron?"
"Yes, I'm Ron, and you're Percy. Now that we have that sorted, have you seen George?"
Percy nodded, and gestured vaguely at the other end of his sofa, where George had fallen asleep after they had polished off a bottle of whiskey together. "Right there."
"Perce. George is not right there."
Percy sat up at looked at the other end of the sofa, then around his flat. "Where's George?!"
Ron sighed. "He left a note for Mum, which Ginny managed to decipher, saying he was here. Mum's having a fit because she thinks George might hurt you or hurt himself or something. I don't know."
Percy's head was still a bit fuzzy, but he was starting to wake up. "George and I are fine. Nothing to worry about. I'm not sure where he went, but he was sitting right there when we both dozed off."
Ron gestured to the empty whiskey bottle on the floor. "More like passed out, I'd guess."
Percy snorted. "Maybe."
With a pop, George appeared. "Here you go, Perce, hangover potion. Oh, hi Ron." George handed Percy a flask of potion which he drank. His head immediately cleared and he felt fully awake.
Ron looked like he couldn't believe his eyes. "Who are you two, and what did you do with my brothers?"
Percy looked at Ron in confusion. "What do you mean?"
"The Percy I know would never take something from George without having seen him make it." Ron looked at George. "And the George I know wouldn't be willingly trying to help Percy."
"You wound me, little brother." George flung his hand over his heart.
Ron rolled his eyes. "Whatever." Ron paused and then seemed to have a sudden realisation. He pointed to George, "I didn't know you supported the Cannons!"
"I don't. These are Percy's pyjamas."
Ron looked between George and Percy several times before settling on Percy. "I don't even want to know why George is wearing your pyjamas. Just get dressed and come to the Burrow for breakfast. I'll go tell Mum you're on the way." With that, Ron apparated.
George burst out laughing, and Percy joined him. "Have I really been that awful, George?"
"Yeah, but so have I. None of that matters now. We've started over."
"Good. I don't know what people would do who didn't have access to a pond."
George laughed, but then abruptly stopped. "Percy! You're brilliant! We can make Portable Ponds! I've got to get dressed, I've got to get to the shop, I guess I should eat first, See you at the Burrow . . ." George apparated.
Percy shook his head. His entire family was crazy, but he was glad to have them back.
After a wonderful breakfast, full of more laughter than Percy had heard in years, Ginny whispered to him, "I'm sure you want to see Twoey, don't you?"
"Yes, that'd be nice."
"Twoey and Arnold have been having fun together. I'll be right back." Ginny winked at Percy, and ran off up the stairs. He wondered at the cause for his sister's mischievous expression.
When Ginny returned, Twoey and Arnold were sitting close together on one of Ginny's shoulders, and Ginny was holding something in her cupped hands.
Percy moved closer to look, and she appeared to be holding a handful of various coloured cotton balls. He glanced at Ginny in confusion.
"Congratulations, Percy! You're a granddad!" Ginny giggled.
"What?!" Percy glanced at the coloured cotton balls again and noticed they were moving. Twoey and Arnold were jumping up and down in excitement on Ginny's shoulder.
Percy pointed to the cotton balls. "Those are baby pygmy puffs?"
Ginny nodded and kept smiling. By this time Charlie and George had become interested in the conversation and wandered over.
"But how did that happen?!" At Percy's question, Ginny, Charlie, and George burst out laughing.
George collected himself first, "You see, Perce, when a boy pygmy puff and a girl pygmy puff fancy each other . . ."
"Arnold's a girl?!"
"No Percy. Twoey's a girl." Ginny said patiently.
"Twoey's a girl? But how do you know?" Percy could have sworn that Twoey rolled his . . . er . . . her eyes at him.
Charlie ruffled Percy's hair and asked, "Did Dad forget to give you The Talk, little brother?"
Percy blushed, tried to smooth his hair, and decided to drop the subject and ignore his siblings. "Twoey, Arnold, you have a lovely family. I'm very happy for you." Twoey and Arnold bounced excitedly.
George chimed in, "Enough with the pygmy puffs. We need to get to work at the shop."
Ginny and Percy addressed Twoey and Arnold almost in unison, "He didn't mean that."
Mum and Hermione were assigned to brewing potions. Harry and Charlie were cleaning the shop, repairing damage, and organizing anything that had survived the Death Eater invasion. Ginny and George were working on the charms for various merchandise. Ron and Percy had been sent to sort out the flat over the shop.
"Ron, can I ask you something?" Ron nodded. "Why were you able to forgive me so easily? I probably hurt you more than any of our other siblings, and I was horrible to Harry . . ."
Ron turned to Percy, despair in his eyes. "I did the same thing."
"When Harry, Hermione, and I were searching for the horcruxes, I got angry and abandoned them. I went to Bill's. I didn't know if I'd ever see them again, but Dumbledore's deluminator got me back there, and they both forgave me."
"Well, Weasleys are in the business of forgiving the unforgivable."
"Harry and Hermione aren't Weasleys."
"Sure they are! Harry's been an honorary Weasley since he was 11, and I'm pretty sure Hermione will be a Weasley for real sometime in the not-too-distant future . . ."
Ron blushed and ran a hand through his hair. "Yeah, s'pose you're right . . ."
"OH PER-CY! COULD YOU PLEASE COME DOWN HERE?"
"You better be careful, Perce. He's doing that sing-song thing that means he's up to something."
"I know. Well, I'll go see what he wants." Ron returned to working as Percy made his way downstairs.
As soon as Percy reached the door to the shop, he heard a high voice shriek, "Percy!"
Percy crossed the room in two steps and before he knew it, Audrey was in his arms and he was kissing her.
His worries had been completely unfounded. Audrey obviously still felt the same way about him, and he thought his chest would burst from joy. He was going to keep kissing Audrey forever. They had nine months apart to make up for, after all. Percy's hands were beginning to wander, as were Audrey's, when Percy heard a deafening shout right in his ear.
"OI! GET A ROOM!"
Percy and Audrey both jumped, and Audrey buried her head in his chest. Percy glanced around at most of his family. George was standing about a foot away from them, just removing the sonorous charm from himself. Ginny and Hermione were giggling, Charlie was smirking and giving Percy a thumbs up, Harry looked like he wanted to be anywhere else, and his Mum was trying to look disapproving, but she couldn't quite hide the twinkle in her eye.
Percy grinned at George, and said, "Brilliant idea, George!" He grasped Audrey more tightly and apparated.
Percy and Audrey landed in his flat, and Audrey let out a nervous giggle into his chest. "I was hoping your Mum would like me."
"What in Merlin's name would make you think my Mum wouldn't like you?"
"Because I threw myself at you without even meeting her properly. And we were snogging rather inappropriately considering we weren't alone."
"I think my Mum will understand. And besides, we're alone now." Percy kissed her again.
Moments later, they paused to breathe, and Audrey said, "Your Mum is going to think I'm a scarlet woman."
Percy thought Audrey was worrying too much, but was also struck with inspiration. He smiled at Audrey. "Well then, I'll just have to make an honest woman out of you, won't I?"
Audrey's eyes widened as Percy took her hand and got down on one knee. "Audrey Anne Mitchell, I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you make me the happiest wizard in the world and be my wife?"
"Yes!" Audrey flung her arms around Percy and kissed him, both of them ending up on their knees clinging to each other. "I love you, too."
Percy beamed at Audrey. "You'll be needing this, then." Percy reached into his pocket and pulled out the box. He opened it so Audrey could see her ring.
"Oh Percy! It's perfect! Put it on me?"
Percy took the ring and slid it onto Audrey's finger. She smiled widely, admiring the ring on her hand, and kissed him.
"When do you want to get married?"
"Tomorrow?" Percy asked hopefully.
"Tomorrow?!" Audrey laughed. "How long have you had the ring?"
"I bought it on my way to the Ministry after the last time I saw you. At the same time I bought your birthday present, which I see you're wearing." Percy smiled.
Audrey fingered her necklace. "I haven't ever taken it off."
"I've been carrying your ring in my pocket with sticking and disillusionment charms since I bought it. If it weren't for Voldemort we would have been married months ago."
"I don't want to wait any longer either, Percy, but Nanny and Uncle Ed probably aren't going to be here by tomorrow." She ran her hand over his cheek. "How about as soon as we can once they arrive?"
"Sounds good." Percy kissed her, and this time they were alone and did not need to stop . . .
. . .until there was loud throat-clearing coming from his fireplace. Percy looked over to see his sister's head in the fire.
"Sorry to interrupt. Mum wants to make sure the two of you will be coming for tea." Ginny smirked at him.
Percy was embarrassed as he realized why Ginny was smirking. He and Audrey were both quite mussed, and his shirt was entirely unbuttoned. He didn't remember that happening.
"Tell Mum my fiancé and I will be glad to come to tea."
"Your . . ." Ginny paused and then squealed. "I'm going to have a sister! Audrey, I'm so happy!"
Audrey smiled, but Percy said, "You have a sister—Fleur. You'll now have another sister."
"I know, but I like Audrey better." Ginny winked. "May I tell everyone or do you want to when you get here?"
"You may go announce 'Percy and his fiancé are coming to tea.'"
Ginny giggled. "O.K. Congratulations to both of you. I'll see you later." Ginny's head vanished from the fire.
"See? My family's going to love you. How could they not?" Percy returned to kissing Audrey.
Epilogue—Nineteen Years Later
Percy glanced nervously at the clock, and yelled up the stairs, "We're going to be late!" He heard giggling from his wife and daughters, but no one answered him. Giggling. That was all he'd heard all summer long. Percy sighed, and climbed the stairs to knock on the door to his oldest daughter's bedroom. Audrey opened the door.
"We're ready." Audrey gave Percy a meaningful look and gestured discreetly to their daughters as she stepped through the door.
Percy took his wife's hint. "You both look lovely." Molly and Lucy beamed at him. Well, at least he'd done something right. For once. He waved his wand, charming both girls' trunks to follow him, and said as cheerfully as he could, "Let's go!"
They all made it to the car without incident. Percy let Audrey drive. He knew how, but didn't really like it. Audrey had music on the radio, something American, he didn't like it, but didn't comment. At least he'd have a minute to be lost in his thoughts. Molly and Lucy were giggling and whispering in the back seat. Again. That's all they did any more. Giggle. And fix their hair. And do their nails. And whisper about The Boy. Yes, his little girl fancied someone. He knew the kid's name, but he preferred to think of him as The Boy in his head. It made the situation less real. He had made the mistake of telling Audrey their daughter was too young to fancy boys. Audrey's reminding him she had her first boyfriend when she was a year younger than Molly did not help his mood at all.
Maybe Percy would have to take Bill out for a pint and see how he was surviving having teenage daughters. He'd invite George along, too, since he'd be in the same situation before long. Of course, Percy was certain Bill's ability to look terrifying when he wanted to was a huge asset in keeping teenage boys away from his girls. Percy once again bemoaned being the least scary of the Weasley brothers. Bill could look terrifying at will. Charlie worked with dragons for Merlin's sake, which was completely wasted since he wasn't married and didn't have children. George could pull all sorts of pranks and not leave any evidence, which the entire world knew since Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes was so popular. Ron was the tallest, and an Auror, and was famous for the whole "Golden Trio" thing. Harry was the Man-who-Killed-Voldemort. That was plenty. Percy worked for the Ministry of Magic—in an office job. Not in the least intimidating. What would he do to his daughter's suitors, memo them to death?
They arrived at Kings Cross, Molly and Lucy still whispering excitedly, though Percy could tell the topic had switched from The Boy to Quidditch. He had no idea how his daughters could be so girly and love Quidditch so much. Of course, Ginny was one of the best professional Quidditch players of all time, but she had never been particularly interested in her hair or nails or clothes or in giggling with their Mum like his daughters were.
Molly had been on the Gryffindor Quidditch team for two years as the Seeker, but now that Lucy was a second year, both girls were trying out to be Beaters, to replace the pair who had just graduated. Percy knew Fred was in Heaven laughing his arse off. George was laughing his arse off right in front of him in between coaching his little girls on how to be Beaters. Percy couldn't help being proud of them—even if they weren't as strong as some Beaters, they had deadly accuracy. But Quidditch was so dangerous, Percy worried about them. Not that anyone listened to him in his Quidditch-crazy family. But he could still try . . .
"Now girls, you remembered all of your Quidditch books, didn't you? I'll owl them if you forgot. Especially remember to keep rereading the chapter of The Beater's Bible that deals with safety. You know how important the safety regulations are . . ." Percy began to list them. He did tend to ramble when he was nervous or worried. He was fairly sure Audrey was rolling her eyes at him, but at least Molly and Lucy were pretending to listen. He couldn't do anything about The Boy but he'd make sure his girls had all the safety regulations about flying and broomsticks and Quidditch memorized. He wasn't going to let his little angels get hurt if he could help it. They actually answered all of his questions correctly when he quizzed them. He was fairly satisfied.
"And remember girls . . ." The train whistle sounded its first blast.
"We know, Daddy. We'll be careful, and we love you, too." Percy hugged Molly and Lucy tightly.
"They have to go, Love. We love you." Audrey hugged them, too.
Percy kissed each of his daughters on top of their heads, said "I love you" and gave them each one last quick hug. He waved feebly at their backs as they ran off in separate directions to find their friends. Lucy quickly found Neville and Hannah's daughter, who waved to him. He saw Molly go to a different car where The Boy met her, picked up her trunk, stowed it, then gave Molly his hand and helped her onto the train. At least he was a gentleman, Percy thought begrudgingly. Then The Boy kissed Molly on the cheek, and Percy changed his mind.
"Love, quit scowling at The Boy," Audrey whispered in his ear. Percy looked at his wife in shock. "Yes, I know. You mutter out loud sometimes, especially if you're stewing before you fall asleep. Come on, they'll both be fine." Audrey took his hand. "You know Neville will act as your spy and look after them."
"How do you know THAT?"
"That you've had Neville as a spy since Molly started at Hogwarts? I have my ways . . ."
"Hannah told you!"
Audrey laughed. "No."
"Then how . . ."
Audrey smiled and took pity on him. "Ginny told me. You didn't think you were the only person using Neville as a spy, did you?"
Percy began to splutter, but Audrey just laughed. "I don't mind. I would have asked Neville to spy myself if you hadn't already. The girls will be fine." Audrey took Percy's hand and began to lead him out of the station. "Let's go home, Love. I've taken the rest of today and tomorrow off." Audrey raised a hand to stop Percy's interruption. "I got the days off for you, too. Now, let's go home and start celebrating my birthday. Properly."
Percy thought that sounded like a very fine idea indeed.